Sunday, November 15, 2015

Notes from my 90th trip (Finados)

Everyone has to have their way to make sense of the world.

There needs to be a steady practice of something to see yourself through the storms.

I think about the people that made compostable garbage bags, and I just wonder how much thought and science must have went behind that, like how much someone would need to know about how many things in order to make that a workable idea. There's no way they started from nothing to eventually get to the goal of compostable garbage bags. They had to have built off of some prior knowledge that was already established. It's all really just serendipitous timing. I'm blabbering about all this to say: 

Focus on what your work is now, no matter how much you think you hate it. There is a reason it exists, there are lessons to be learned, and the only real way to get out of a tough spot is to master the thing you hate. 

A lot of times what we think is good for the world is actually just good for us. It's important to keep that ego in check.

Regardless of your opinion on fighting, to see and meet someone who has mastered an art of combat is impressive, if you know the time, sacrifice and discipline the higher levels require. 

It's amazing how much we can play the victim in a relationship when we're only looking at it from one angle. It's funny, but when Flora and I were together, even the mere suggestion of us breaking up was preposterous, like someone had tried to convince me that gravity did not exist. Us being together was a fact embedded into my heart. It was the only thing I was sure of. Still kind of am. 

Flora was super irresponsible in so many ways, but she was never vicious towards me. That just wasn't part of her nature. But I was to her. She saw very ugly sides of me. I see that now. That's what needs to leave my body.

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