Michael, you have inherited the being that is haunting your family. It is ancestral. It is up to you if you want it to finally end w/ you.
I think the moment I started doubting Ken Wilber as any sort of teacher to follow was the moment he openly admitted to beating the shit out of his wife, who was diagnosed w/ terminal cancer and was dying, then tried to somehow make himself out to be a victim in the whole ordeal. It's like yeah...go fuck yourself dude.
I could not have become a boxer without the help of Grace Kong.
The women who have appeared in my life vying for the position Flora once held should know exactly what that position is. It is the throne of my life, my example o be a better person, to honor and never betray. Never hurt. That is how I revered Flora. That is the type of dedication I was talking about because I am ready.
Basically, if you are to ask what I've been doing w/ my life, it is aI am taking care of my home. It is and has been going through a significant remodeling.
Perhaps the best message I took away from watching the 2hrs 22mins of "The Martian" can be seen in one of its previews. It says:
"I guarantee you, that at some point, everything is going to go south on you. And you're going to say, 'This is it. This is how I end.' Now you can either accept that, or you can get to work."
The truth of a great writer is that they are a channel for the divine and it is their duty to care for the vehicle that needs to deliver that message.
The passing of Dennis Costello brought together 400 bikers across America. Let me repeat that. 400 bikers. Like tattooed outlaws for real. They had a motorcade running from Seattle to Tacoma. For a man to have that kind of influence, that much affect on so many individuals that they came out to send him off well, is an inspiration to aspire to.
I once met a very pretty girl at a bar in L.A. She's actually the one that started our conversation. It went:
"I told your friend that I find you intimidating, but he told me you were a really nice guy and that I should just talk to you."
"And what do you think?"
"I don't know yet, but why do you wear that do-rag?" (It wasn't a do-rag, but looks like one.)
"It's not a do-rag."
"Whatever it is, you should lose it. Because you're so cute, but you wearing that scares women away."
I ignore the insulting cultural implication and just smile in response, taking in the compliment more than anything.
"I'm serious, you're really good looking! You could probably have any girl here."
I probably blushed at this point.
"But don't get any ideas," she said. "I'm married."
We then had a 15 min conversation about she met her husband (b/c that's what I would do w/ that information). Turns out, they were together for 7 years before they got married, suffered a number of betrayals (mostly infidelity, mostly from him) and it wasn't until a six-month no-contact period that he proposed to her. After all that I said:
"How did you get over all that? I mean, how did you trust him again?"
And she looked at me, w/ the deadest look in her eyes, and said the words that have been tattooed on my heart ever since.
"I had to forgive him," she said.
I respect and appreciate Floyd Mayweather Jr. as a fighter, but I feel differently about him as a person. I disagree w/ almost everything he represents, primarily his obsession and God-like revere of money. That and he beat the shit out of the mother of his children. I don't think people pay enough attention to that.
"Healing is not an event. Salvation is not an event. It is a path to be followed."
I am not looking to be married; I have met someone that I want to marry. There's a huge difference.