Notes from my 58th trip (Illuminação)

"The path is meant to be walked upon, not ran upon, but walked."

Brazil taught me how to be a peaceful person.

I can tell Flora trusts me by the way she makes love.

Hold every moment as sacred, for we never know if it will be our last.

It is an honor anytime someone remembers my name.

The measure of a good sparring partner is how well they can receive your beast.

Indians have an explanation for everything.

Laziness disguises itself in many ways.

It is truly delicious when all the thoughts and words you've said in the past are in concordance of who you are, especially in a moment of emergency.

Desirée once called my tattoos, "delicious". I couldn't have wanted a better word.

You learn how much you love a person in the time you are apart from them.

I once asked Desirée if she wanted me to go or to stay. She said, "It must go." 
Flora told me to "stay".

Californication had one of the worst endings I've seen in my life.

In some ways, pornstars can be viewed as "curanderas". But only a select few.

I know too much about porn.

It is amazing when you have an explanation for everything.

The Star of David is basically two triangles living in harmony.

Notes from my 57th trip (Baptismo na Floresta)

Bukowski was one of those guys that didn't need anyone's help, but at the same time you wanted him to stop hurting.

The forest is dying. If it goes, we all go.

Having fun and indulging in your vices is okay at the right time, but when it starts interrupting your mission, it becomes a problem.

I think one of the biggest problems w/ me and Flora is that I really believed that I wasn't important in her life.

My parents gave me many gifts, but I don't think they expected me to use it in this way.

Japanese people are fucking crazy.

I've seen a lot of fucked up films. I mean I fucking BOUGHT a film called "Cannibal Holocaust". Like WTF?

Remember. How a person is at a particular moment is not permanent.

Life becomes a lot different when you encounter the sacred arts.

We have to believe that there exists other romantic relationships than the one our parents had.

I totally put Desirée in the position of what it feels like for black people to hate white people.

Flora one time thought that I wanted to kill her. Like seriously end her life. But she needs to know that my mission is for her to LIVE.

When someone kills themselves out of cowardice, that is a tragedy.

The first crush I remember having was Kia Charisma. I mean look at that name. I remember one day she had really smelly feet and I thought to myself, "I would still love her, even if she had smelly feet."

I dated someone from the internet for 2 years. Like we sent each other letters and presents for our birthdays. The reason we broke up is because she found out I was only 14.

The internet will show you how racist the world still is.

We weave our own harmony. It is key to see how all the hobbies in your life influence the other. It is there how we learn to live our story.

Notes from my 56th trip (Baptismo na Floresta)

I haven't seen a mirror ever since I arrived to the forest.

One thing that I love about Flora is that she will randomly take off her footwear and start walking barefoot.

These days there is so much fucking bullshit in the world. Lies, false prophets, we even have a fucking technique to make people trust them. What the fuck is that? It is a gift, a true blessing, when you can enter a place + it is honest. You can trust. That is your instinct. That is how I feel about the forest.

Quem chega são guerreiros; quem fica são guardiões.

"When water flows thru your body, and you are steady on the earth, the fire no longer hurts you. It is part of the family."

Here in the forest, you can see how everything started.

When you start understanding the lesson, your facial expressions become really honest.

I didn't choose this path. This path has literally chosen me.

Ceu do Mar will lead you to where you're meant to be.

I miss my father.

If I ever write a book, a definite 'thank you' will go to the Yawanawa tribe.

When you are truly at peace, you can enter anywhere protected. 

Nothing will harm you.

The thing about true love, is that you have to have an incredible amount of faith and belief that it will all just work out.

I am very proud to say that the majority of my life is going well.

Goddamn. When I really think about it and am honest w/ myself, I am such a fucked up mess. No, like really. A lot of you that know me only see a part of me and no one knows that type of thoughts and emotions I am passing through when I am alone in my bed. But I'm trying to straighten that all out. I really am. I just hope someone will love me at the end of all of it.

I make friends easily because I very quickly realized that I cannot make this journey alone.

There is always something you can find admirable in a person you do not like at first.

You learn things much more quickly when you are humble.

When you apologize sincerely, the other side loses all its power to be justifiably angry.

There is still a lot in my heart that needs to learn how to forgive.

There haven't been many times, but there have been a few times where I am shitting and throwing up at the same time. That is a confusing experience.

I go to a lot of place by myself, and I seem happy, but I am always missing Flora.

It strikes me as ironic that people from the 'civilized' world call indigenous people 'uncivilized'. There is a complete social order here which if I am to sum up, it would be as 'family' and 'trust'. Granted, there are their disputes + problems, like any other society. But there is certainly more honesty here .And w/o honesty, what is civilization?

'The heart balances the earth.'

Notes from my 55th trip (Baptismo na Floresta)

O mundo é o melhor livro
E o melhor mestre vivir
Deus é meu melhor amigo
É amor dentro de mim
É amor dentro de ti.

Thank you for existing.

São Miguel a frente, São Miguel atras, São Miguel a direito, São Miguel a esquerda, São Miguel a cima, São Miguel a baixo. São Miguel, São Miguel, São Miguel. Onde quer eu vá, eu sou teu amor que me protege. Onde quer eu vá, eu sou teu amor que me protege. Onde quer eu vá, eu sou teu amor que me protege. (x3)

Notes from my 54th trip (Baptismo na Floresta)

I wish you could hear the win w/ me now, the rolling thunder, the coming rain. I wish this more than anything in my life, but the best I can do is be here, in our name.